I met Gal of Gallantly, Gal in the blogosphere a year or two ago. It started with us commenting on each other’s posts, learning we were very similar, and developing a fast friendship from there. I love her aesthetic and gentle but powerful voice, and she’s here today to discuss a pitfall many multipotentialites fall prey to. Take it away, Gal!
I always knew that there were so many things I wanted to do in life. I primarily consider myself a writer, but I also love to sketch, draw comics, sing, direct, edit, and so much more. All the possibilities make me feel like I am spinning around and around until I am dizzy and confused. It can be overwhelming to have so many interests. What if I only have enough time to be average all-around? I thought that I had to figure out a direction; I also thought choosing one path would close me off to everything else, which brought out my inner commitment phobe.
However, that second part is the limiting belief. Life and the people in it made me think I could only choose one direction in life and go from there. Why wouldn’t I fear commitment, then?
But then I realized they were only half-right for people like me, and it was refreshing to learn what exactly people like me were. Audra was the one to introduce the multipotentialite to me. She learned about it from Emilie’s Ted Talk. And I plan to pass it onto others, too. This type of information has to be shared! A multipotentialite is “someone with many interests and creative pursuits.”
That is me. And that’s totally okay! Perhaps that’s why writers, actors, producers Tina Fey and Mindy Kaling are my role models. The one path for life works for some and it doesn’t for others, like all things in life. There are rules and there are exceptions, and sometimes they even come in 50/50 ratios. I don’t know the percentage of multipotentialites in the world, but I believe that more and more are coming out into the world with some comfort and ease.
However, most of society still expects people to have one goal in mind. Multipotentialites are told, “You can’t do it all.” And this is not entirely wrong. I can’t be pulling myself into multiple directions maniacally. I get that. I am resigned to the fact that some interests will remain hobbies that I won’t ever truly excel at on an expert level.
At the same time, this is a limiting belief. It immediately stops me in my track. I allow it to hold me back. I get scared because I see all these paths before me. This is not a normal fork in the road. This fork has got 1,000 tines laid out before me as multiple walkways of life. I am told I can only go on one, and there may be no crossover with other roads. There just isn’t enough time and opportunity for that. After all, someone who drops their successful law career after fifteen years to open up a food truck is looked at as if he or she is completely bonkers. This is not a game with a reset option that allows me to materialize back at the fork to try a different pathway.
I know that in a way this is my own mindset limiting myself. I am exaggerating on what I am told or even using others as an excuse for my self-limits out of fear, but I am someone who finds words to be one of the most powerful things in the universe. Words are the ones that form limiting beliefs, and these limiting beliefs are the thoughts that dictate every single thing I do.
So I want to make an adjustment to the “You can’t do it all” decree. I want to turn it into something healthier and more constructive by adding just two words: “You can’t do it all at once.”
What I mean to say is, “You can do it all someday.”
The people telling me to pick one path were half-right. Pick one path for now. Have one goal for now. I also have to give credit to and have trust in the people who advise me that picking something right now is not an end all be all, because there are such wise people in my life, as well.
This is an oath I wrote to myself one day when I found myself drowning in self-doubt:
“I’m always saying there’s so much I want to do that I’m too overwhelmed to do anything. I don’t know where to start. But here’s the thing. If I don’t start somewhere, I won’t be able to get all of that done. Not even that I won’t get anything done—I won’t get ALL of it done. And I want all of it. And so that will be my goal—to do all of it. Not think of limiting myself, but finding a place to start. Then I will keep moving forward, conquering land north, south, east, west, until I’ve gathered and pulled into my circle everything I’ve ever wanted.
It is so easy to forget, to shrivel up, to want to give up, to just wallow in this emotion or that emotion, to compare, and more, but with this promise I will be who I need to be for myself.”
So believe that you can do it–all of it. Whether your dreams are to be an astronaut and professional equestrian… Okay, wait. Yeah, sure, why not? Don’t let the limits of age, education, experience, social standing, or any of that stop you. Especially do not let people’s expectations of what is “standard,” “normal,” “practical,” or “to be expected” stop you, either. They can keep on flappin’ their lips while you dance toward your dreams as starry-eyed as you please!
Embrace all of your interests. Show each of them love and attention. Because they all make up who you are, and I know, without a doubt, you are wonderful and you can have all you ever wanted someday. As long as you start now.
Thanks so much Gal! I encourage you to check out her blog. It’s so pretty, and she has a lot of great insights and fun features.
I think having a career is a relatively new thing, especially for women who are supposed to be homemakers and mothers, too. (I know there is different pressure for men and I’m not discounting that either. In fact, it might be considered more acceptable for women to be a multipotentialite, rather than a man who’s supposed to be the “breadwinner” and provide for the family. I don’t know! TANGENT! Sorry!)
Anywayyy…I’m reminded of these sayings “having it all” and “having your cake and eating it too”, but, yeah, then there are well-meaning voices that say, “you can’t have it all or do it all”. So there you go. (I swear I’m sober at the moment.) But I liked what you said about not doing everything at this moment, like there’s a season for everything and possibly every interest.
Some interests also have a tendency to combine themselves rather well. All in all, I enjoyed reading our personal power statement.
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Right? I love how Gal explains it. And in my own experience I’ve felt that sense of a season change from one thing to another, and it’s reassuring in a way but frustrating as well, since it’s hard to tell when one interest is a seasonal thing or whether it’s a lifelong thing.
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I am enjoying this concept of seasons to express our interests, and I completely agree with you on the constant self-questioning >< Thank you again for letting me write for your blog!!
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ANY time. 😉
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Time will tell. I’m finding it’s about switching my mode of thinking from ‘right now’ to playing the long game. Reminders, reminders, reminders.
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I LOVE tangents and rambling, so I got you! I do them all the time and will take this as a sign of intelligence, so do not apologize! And thank you for reading 😀
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Haha, you are too kind.
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This is so relatable… “If I don’t start somewhere…” I know this alright but it’s easy to keep overthinking and getting lost in a maze of your own aspirations and getting nothing done #multipotentialiteProbs. From my experience, once you start in what feels right in the moment, it just sprouts into all the other stuff you ever wanted (though one by one)..
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Absolutely. I think that’s one of the hardest things about being a multipod although I love it, it just feels like my heart and brain get pulled away so easily down the rabbit trails!
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Exactly! I love being one too…
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Also I love the phrase “lost in a maze of your own aspirations.” That’s perfect.
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Thanks. It just came from the heart 🙂
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